Thursday, December 27, 2018

AT THE END OF 2018, DO YOU REMEMBER (Sowripalayam sayings)



AT THE END OF 2018, DO YOU REMEMBER (Sowripalayam Sayings!)



Do you remember the days you prayed for the things you have now?

Do you remember the hungry children displaced by wars, when your child cries?

Do you remember the homeless, when you travel out of the comfort of home?

Do you remember the hungry street dogs trashing the bins, when you feed your own dogs?


While we know we cannot solve all of world's problems, let us remember them!

For if we don't, who else is going to?


'BE THE CHANGE YOU WANT TO SEE' ! (MG)

Monday, December 24, 2018

THREE STAGES OF MAN !


THREE STAGES OF MAN !

I learnt the Seven Stages of Man by Shakespeare in school. In fact by heart and vaguely remember reciting it for some competition in St Joseph’s High School,Trichy!

Introduction:

With growing years, I wonder why there are 7 stages of man!

Is it because a historical poet and the world’s greatest dramatist (the Bard of Avon) wrote this a long time ago? Does this not have variation in the tropical, third world countries?

You may soon know my dilemma in understanding his characterization of the seven stages - 'infant, schoolboy, lover, soldier, justice, pantalone and the old age' in the third world!

Peramble:

I recently met a man with my name who was 40 years old in the outpatient department. He told me I had delivered him and so his mom named him after me. So I thought I was sort of qualified in my own limited way, to write on what I think are the stages of man in the third world.

I must also mention my grandson who is only 2 years old, teaches me a lot about life.  After seeing his countenance, his moods in pre-school era, I wonder if I should blindly follow the 7 stages as the gospel truth!

I also spend considerable time with ‘Uncle Sam’ who is 86 years old at music practice and plays first violin with me. He needs no glasses to read the music score, he all his teeth intact, his taste is superb as he said last night at dinner that the ‘biriyani’ could have been a bit more spice! So obviously Shakespeare had not met the likes of ‘Uncle Sam’ when he described the seventh stage as ‘mere oblivion,sans teeth, sans eyes, sans taste, sans everything’

3 Stages of man:

I think life is a lot simpler with only 3 basic stages of man. This seems to fit most guys I know in all decades of life. The three stages comprise of his firm belief as to why he is on this earth! After all, life is only how we lead it, and we lead it by our effective actions aided by our firm beliefs.

The first stage is when he believes he is the supreme power. All he has to do is to make a noise and everyone will dance to his tune! There is no doubt in his mind that he is supreme human being and that all the others exist merely to please him! My young grandson belongs to this category! He demands whatever is precious to me, knowing he will get it! This is the age of Pre-School!




The second stage comprises of school and college days. This is the time the child in the third world learns social behavior. He learns what to say (and what not to say), when to say it, how to say it and most of all when not to say anything at all! He also learns that he is no longer the master of universe or the king of the castle! There are all sorts of guys around – ‘Annas and Thambis’! During this stage he is aware that though there are stronger, mightier and cleverer guys around, he knows he has to work hard. Or so he is told in school. The harder he works, the better marks, more the medals, more the glory! He knows life is fair!



During the second stage, he also learns that he has to be fair to everyone, to be polite, to follow the rules of the road, never to cheat, to be kind to the poor, the widows and always help the physically challenged. He is often told of ‘ heaven and hell’ or ‘karma’ depending on his actions. He knows life is fair, he knows if he competes on merit, he can do anything. His knowledge is marked and his physical skills are recorded in black and white.

‘Sky is the limit’!

‘The world is your oyster’!

  
The third stage is the ‘stage of reality’. After he qualities, he applies for a job. He attends the interview, fails to get the job despite better marks and qualifications … the other guy is better connected! And finally when he gets the job, more than mere marks; other material factors play a major role! When he works hard, his work is published by his superior without putting his name on the report (or the book)! When things go wrong he gets blamed by the fault of someone else with higher political connections and may have to officially take the fall for the other guy. By the time he experiences or witnesses these incidents, he has reached mid thirties and early forties.


The wife and his children play a decisive role in his life. He knows clearly that life is never black and white as taught in the school (the second stage) , but life is in shades of grey! He has now learnt to fit in the system … the knack of ( ?art) getting  school admissions, ways of easing the procedures of his house building, later getting his kids to college and then settling them in jobs.

So, by the time he enters his fifties, he has turned a philosopher! Either a cynic if he not learnt to compromise and this often brings on depression or he can choose the path of knowing the life will play itself out.

Cynic as he has become a pessimist when he fears the most, expects the worst & perfoms the  least!
If he is not a pessimist, knows by now that one cannot correct everything in the system. That one can only do the so called ‘right thing’ when most of the others may be taking the short cut. He has developed the mentality of ‘que sera, sera’ or ‘whatever will be, will be’  He has become ‘the change you want to see’! (Mahatma Gandhi)

He also learns that the people in the 8th and 9th decades, generally criticize less, move more, eat less, do their own chores and are easily contended. He may be ‘sans’ so many things as mentioned by Shakespeare. If he had lived well and looked after himself well, he will be sane in body (as permitted by his age), mind and soul.

PS: I have outlined the classical 7 stages of man by Shakespeare for reference to those who wish to refresh again!

All the world's a stage,
And all the men and women merely players;
They have their exits and their entrances,
And one man in his time plays many parts,
His acts being seven ages. At first, the infant,
Mewling and puking in the nurse's arms.
Then the whining schoolboy, with his satchel
And shining morning face, creeping like snail
Unwillingly to school. And then the lover,
Sighing like furnace, with a woeful ballad
Made to his mistress' eyebrow. Then a soldier,
Full of strange oaths and bearded like the bard,
Jealous in honour, sudden and quick in quarrel,
Seeking the bubble reputation
Even in the cannon's mouth. And then the justice,
In fair round belly with good capon lined,
With eyes severe and beard of formal cut,
Full of wise saws and modern instances;
And so he plays his part. The sixth age shifts
Into the lean and slippered pantaloon,
With spectacles on nose and pouch on side;
His youthful hose, well saved, a world too wide
For his shrunk shank, and his big manly voice,
Turning again toward childish treble, pipes
And whistles in his sound. Last scene of all,
That ends this strange eventful history,
Is second childishness and mere oblivion,
Sans teeth, sans eyes, sans taste, sans everything.

PPS: Not mention of women. This is because Shakespeare in all his wisdom referred to ‘man’! Who am I, a mere mortal, to contract him? I hasten to add that the same rules apply to women as well. In fact statistics show that women live longer than men!

Friday, December 21, 2018

CHRISTMAS IS ABOUT GIVING!



Christmas is about giving

Christmas is about 'Giving' . 

'Goodwill to all men' in simple term means (to me )'giving'!

It is all about giving to those who need them,
                      giving in private or public ( as per your belief),
                      giving in service or kind or cash,
                      giving without their asking,
                      giving without asking anything in return,
                      giving when no one asks anything, but you know they need it
                      giving humans and giving animals!

Music ( close to my heart), greetings, gifts, new clothes, Sunday's best, decorations, social meetings, religious meetings, family meetings, dinners, parties.... with families and friends are all fine! They are needed immensely !

But let us not forget the needy, the easily forgotten, less remembered folks among us! 

For if we do, no one else would remember them!

Wednesday, October 17, 2018

A Train Travel to Remember - Decker!






"Travelling is more than having a destination in mind! It is discovering a place in your heart you have never been before"



My first time on the Double Decker Train, at least in India. Coimbatore to Bangalore.

Kind of strange when I saw on the digital display at station that it was due to start in PF 6!  When I footed to PF 6, I saw a Pollachi passenger in situ!! Double decker was staying way beyond in the dark dawning of 5.30 am!

Have I made a mistake in booking by this train , parked in an insignificant platform , unceremoniously beyond a local  passenger train?!

Things took a turn when I walked towards a huge, lively diesel engine, much larger than usual!

The train as such was bulky ,with compartments which looked not unlike the long distance North American trains!

Once I stepped in, I knew the difference.... Green everywhere! Live digital display of the stations, with visual announcements! No noise.



The train left on the dot, maintaining prompt punctuality throughout. Displays showed oncoming stations and so there was no confusion as to where we were , as is commonly seen in Indian trains, where many folks keep looking outta windows to see the name of stations!

Seating was 2: 3, unlike the usual 3:3. Seats were kind of narrow, but with adequate foot space!

 Bio-toiets too!



Clean,  well laid out toilets!



Pantry car was small, but stationed frequently between the carriages; hence there must be many pantry cars in this train! 



The food is still from IRCTC canteens🙄, but packed better 😉! In the modern world, it appears packaging is everything! 😂🤣

Young bright waiters who responded with knowledge and speed! I was told train was in service for only for the past 3 months!

They politely asked me if I wanted breakfast  - idly and vada with coffee! I might, after a while. Lovely spacious windows with a great full view too!



I heard a woman ask in the carriage if there was any service 😀 ! You know that means no one was bringing snacks to the seats and crowding up the aisles with coffee containers!😂  

No gender biasis too... the ticket examiner was a lady! Efficient, quiet!



Now on the negative side, the absence of noisy hawkers selling tea, coffee, snacks was deafening! Too quiet! .... Except for some inconsiderate travellers who were too loud on their phones! One also missed the smell of the countryside ( though at times I'd rather 🤣)!

The highlight of course was a video chat with my 2 year old grandson who recited all the 26 alphabets in English! His first time ever! Wow! The sun suddenly looked brighter ☀🌝!I walked to the vestibule to take the lengthy call.... why can't we all do the same !

I was happy not to have flown, but taken the train! I know life is not about how many things you rush through, but how you enjoy the journey ...mm... literally!

The double decker is not just a great train, but also a show piece for a growing great nation!

It reminded me of the suburban trains of New York, but less noisy, less crowded. Plus it is wifi enabled !! But only time will tell how we maintain the beauty of what have acquired !





















Saturday, September 22, 2018

"WHY PEOPLE COME BACK TO YOU" A TESTIMONIAL TO ANURAG HOSPITAL,COIMBATORE

' WHY PEOPLE COME BACK TO YOU'


A TESTIMONIAL TO ANURAG HOSPITAL, COIMBATORE



Sometimes one wonders what is the point of becoming a doctor .... and a surgeon at that. What you set out to be at 15 years of age when you start training, goes on all your life time , even decades later!

It is really and most certainly worth it , when you receive a note of appreciation - rather a testimony- of what your services offer and what you mean as a physician / surgeon to the person who receives your professional attention.

It is said,
                " Not everything that counts can be counted,
                           Not everything that is counted truly counts" 

This letter received from a patient who recently underwent surgery at ANURAG HOSPITAL, COIMBATORE means a lot not only to the team who treated her, but also to the person who wrote it!

The patient has kindly permitted to have this as a blog. The writer's name is erased to maintain confidentiality.



Why people come back to you 


I was first introduced to DR. John AC Thanakumar when I was referred to him by our family doctor Dr. V.Chandra of Kovaipudur. It was in the year 2006 and I had gone to her for a consultation on feeling a cyst in my right chest. My family and friends strongly advised that this should not be brushed aside nor postponed. 

My husband and I waited outside the consulting room of Dr. John in Kovai Medical college and Hospital ( KMCH) with a lot of trepidation. KMCH had lot of memories to provide . My daughter was born here in 2000 – happy days which we would always cherish . But more were the days spent here in 2001 when my late mother was frequently in and out of KMCH due to her prolonged illness which lasted for nearly a year after which she breathed her last . Hence both sweet and sad memories – similar to life .


We were meeting Dr. John for the first time and we had come there only on the assurance given by Dr. Chandra that he was one of the leading surgeons in town . On going through the reports , the doctor was very quick in his decision- that a surgery was needed, giving us no room for fear or sentiments .We guess that was what gave us the confidence – when he nailed the fact that the cysts has to be removed immediately instead of needling and sending it for biopsy . Having a 6 year old daughter at home , my fear knew no bounds hearing the doctors words .what seemed to be a mountain dwindled in to a mole on hearing the doctors clear and patient explanation . He concluded that as such he was available in the city for a couple of days and was ready to do the surgery on the same day or the very next day . we headed back home, pondered on the doctors words and came to the conclusion that I needed to go ahead with the surgery. 


Our next meeting with the doctor was during my first and final review after a couple of weeks ( I don’t remember recognising him in the operation theatre as there were a few of them – all masked in their professional attire ). The doctor was full of energy and cheer . The way he removed the band aid was so abrupt and rapid that it still flashes in my memory – for a second it was unbearable pain. He explained that if done in a slow manner the pain would have been double fold during the whole process . By now , it was clear that he was quite proficient in his profession . He was citing some examples of few surgeries he had performed on some models which did not even leave a scar . I was then not in a mental status of appreciating the scarless surgery as I was worried about what the reports would say . My joy knew no bounds when he confirmed that it was just fibrodenomas . Hence I returned to my normal routine life .


We moved to Chennai a couple of years later .Months turned to years . The surgery was done so efficiently that there was not even a slight prick or a pain in the area to remind me of the same and it did not leave a scar too . Being a Banker , when I listen to clients appreciating a doctor’s work or when I interact with clients who are doctors , I would remember with gratitude a humane , dynamic and a skilled surgeon of Coimbatore whom I had failed to appreciate for the scarless surgery .

Twelve years later , on feeling some discomfort in the left axilla , I had a scan in which again 2 cysts were noticed in the right chest . I recollected that Dr. John had hinted earlier that my body did have a tendency to develop fibrodenomas and also that I may get it say, after 10 or 15 years . 


The start of another tension filled period began – family and friends insisting to go for another consultation . My husband was on travel, overseas , on job and my daughter was taking up her boards which made my presence at home mandatory . As the consultation was kept on the back burner, the fear slowly started to creep in . I was heading our Adayar Branch and then subsequently our Mylapore Branch .We were staying at Mylapore , Chennai . Hence we had doctors and hospitals at every nook and corner . But the speculation that I might have to undergo yet another surgery triggered the recollection of an efficient Surgeon of Coimbatore . My husband and I then decided that it would be the best to go back to him given his pin point diagnosis in the past. 


I was informed by the receptionist of KMCH that Dr. John was no longer with KMCH . I googled to find out that he was now practicing in the hospital he has founded : “ Anurag Hospital “ . We did not have any second thoughts . We reached “ Anurag Hospital “ at Sowripalayam , Coimbatore on the 5thof Sept 2018. We waited in the neat reception hall of the hospital which brought back the memories of us waiting in the lobby of KMCH. During the wait , we noticed that the hospital team was lead by Dr. John and his family – wife , son and daughter in law – a family of doctors . It is undoubtedly , the dedication and sincerity he has towards his profession which must have made him reach here . It is a very neatly maintained hospital with all the amenities especially the friendly staff . Being a busy doctor with innumerable patients , he did not remember us but he was more or less the same person whom we had met 12 years before . The stay in the hospital was just for two days after surgery during which we understood that the doctor and team also gave back to the community in various ways like free treatment for the poor , conducting free medical camps etc.. The surgery reports were luckily diagonised again as fibrodenomas .


On our journey back home which was 25 km away from the hospital , it dawned on us that when people come back to you inspite of the innumerable choices that they have , it is just not the skill and efficiency but the trust and confidence which is instilled in them . It is the kind and sincere gesture the person shows at the time of need . This applies to all professions , be it banking , teaching , sales etc . There may be 100’s of Doctors like Dr. John but there would certainly be 1000s of patients who are thankful to such doctors as the old saying goes “ Doctors are next to Gods “


May the Lord Almighty shower his blessings on the Team of Doctors and staff of “ Anurag Hospital 

Appreciating the sincere efforts of the entire team of “ Anurag Hospital “
J.....  ..
( Patient ) "




Friday, July 13, 2018

WRIST WATCHES – Do we still need them?


WRIST WATCHES – Do we still need them?


I discovered (on google news) today new Chinese Quart watches are being launched!

I remember the time my dad got me a HMT watch. Initially I was very proud of it – it had to be wound by hand, it had two dials one for the time and another for day date.. quite large and heavy. But later on, when my school mates changed to newer kinetic models where no winding up of the watch was required, with more dials and flashy screens ,I was fed up. 




In fact the HMT watches kept on working and keeping the right time for decades. They never died! Dads loved them !

But over the past 2 decades, the watches seem to have changed for quartz watches which work on batteries, now the solar batteries are in fashion! Smart watches are’ in’ and the prices are more affordable.


But do we still need watches?  

Mobile phone is the most personal item that one carries. It has the function of phone calls. Messages, calculator, music player, movie player, still camera, video camera, gaming console and of course last but not the least - the clock, not to mention the timer, alarm and stop watch.

Looking at the wrist during a boring lecture is considered impolite. But a discrete look at the mobile will not only be polite, but also tell you how many minutes you have wasted!

A faulty battery in the quartz watch sends you worrying about getting a new one. It is not uncommon for people to change watches rather than batteries !!

Being a surgeon and a violinist, I find wrist watch cumbersome and it comes in the way of my profession and passion.

No worries about allergy to the watch strap

But is the wrist watch popular still? BBC survey in UK showed that 14 %  population felt no need for wrist watches as cell phone have taken over the function. So it is a growing trend to find your time on the mobile phone.

In fact the young people who grow up with technology find it easy to check time on the phone!


What do the wrist watch wears say?


These are a fashion statement, especially the expensive watches.  Some women still consider the watches as expensive pieces of jewelry! 

So if you are still wearing a wrist watch, relax…. You are with the 86 % of the population and you have the ‘time’ to look at your watch for the ‘time’!

Young guys like me (!) feel they are redundant.

Also no tell tale sun marks on wrists and no strap allergies !


Tuesday, December 19, 2017

MAINTAINING FRIENDSHIPS!


              MAINTAINING FRIENDSHIPS 





"Books like friends should be good and few"


Over the years, I have gained a lot of friends  from childhood, school, college, early work, recent work, associations and social groups.

One despite being busy with one's own professional or business activities, should learn to nurture, continue and grow these friendships. After all, that is the purpose of life; what makes us different from the animals!

If you draw circles around you, the various zones around will form friends of differing types. It is good to know which zone, close or far, each friend belongs to. The same person may shift to various zones depending on your (or his/ her) commitments too!



What are friends for?

( I feel that you should learn to be at peace within yourself even when no one is around! 
The motto should be 'My best company is me!')




In general, friends are needed to 

- maintain social activities with 
- to call up and chat any time
- to seek advice from as and when you need it
- to give advice whenever it is asked for
- to confide in when in trouble or sadness.





To maintain good and long friendships, some qualities matter

- honesty
- regular contacts ( not necessarily frequent)
- learn to say 'no' to friends if it against your better judgement.If they cannot take it, the friendship is not worth it.
- regular hang outs coffee, jogging,social meetings to name a few, if they are locally placed.





Facebook friends and Whats App are applications where 'friends' are easily available nowadays. But in cyberspace, one should realize that what you say not only goes to 'friends', but also to ' friends of friends' whom you do not know.  Facebook also suggests 'friends' for you, which is not how it is done in real life. Good to be aware of these facts.





Hence in cyberspace, (Facebook, Whats App)
- never share intimate moments
- never share when you are too angry, too sad or emotionally upset
- never pass comments about anyone which you will not say directly to his / her face
- never bad things about your last job ( you need the reference. Also when you sleep over it, things look better the next day!)
- avoid political or religious strong sentiments
- never confidential statements about  your finances or your holidays when you are away from home,


Coming back to real friendships,
- be supportive and non judgmental
- Having said that, good friends sometimes give solid advice which are difficult to swallow! True friends do not hesitate to be critical, when you are going astray and doing something really, really stupid!
- If you can give more than you take, then you are a good friend in a relationship. The converse is also true, if your friend gives more than he / she takes, that person is a good friend!
- spare time when needed by your friend on occasions.

Now for the cautions in friendships!
- Money, booze and moral issues will and always do sour a friendship very rapidly. Not worth it.
- Do not intrude into a friend's personal matters uninvited. You may be in the wrong zone. Respect the privacy of your friend.
- In a similar fashion, till you know the other personal well, best keep a distance, criticize less and be less judgmental. 
- Last of all, when friendship involves people of opposite sex, DO NOT confuse friendship with love. If the lady is ever in love with you, she is capable of expressing it; do not be carried away by what you see in movies! 








Remember,'the rich and the famous ( nowadays the powerful too) have loads of friends'! If you are poor and a nobody, you will be lucky to have even a single one!

A common saying in New York is, "If you need a friend, get a dog!" It is true dogs make excellent friends. Totally non-verbal and totally true!


But that's an entirely a different topic!